Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Ready, set, RESET!

Oh hey! Remember me? I sure remember a me that I want to get back to. Here's a quick recap:

I lost a bunch of weight and documented here for all to be motivated by. It held me accountable. I loved it. I got down to 215 pounds.

In 2013 I started working at a veterinarian office with pretty endless sweets on the weekends. At first I resisted, but it started to get me.

In 2014 I quit trying altogether in favor of grief eating. I gained a ton of weight back.

In 2016 my then-fiance and I were on a reality weight-loss show and I gained a bunch of muscle and lost a lot of fat before our wedding.

The first year of marriage was very stressful and I once again abandoned all progress to deal the way I know I shouldn't but I do anyway: stress-eating.

And I'm back to 271 pounds, and I feel gross and my body moves like an old woman, and I don't like how I look in anything, and I'm just uncomfortable all the time.

Tim has had so much self-control in the last month or so, and he lost 18 pounds in the weeks before we went to South Africa in the beginning of August. He gained 5 back while we were there, but I was pleasantly surprised to find that I had actually lost a few pounds! I've been having a hard time coming up with any motivation to really put in the effort to lose weight again, but something in seeing no weight gain on a trip I thought had certainly added more pounds gave me that little kick I needed!

Tim and I have been going to bed early (10pm), and this morning I woke up at 6. I *almost* got out of bed and went to the gym, but I decided to be lazy. I don't know why, other than just bad habits and self-sabotage, but I made up for it tonight when we were trying to come up with something to do before bed that wouldn't keep us up until midnight, because we're really trying to stay on this new schedule and start getting enough sleep.

Tim had suggested going to a movie earlier in the day, but I vetoed that idea when I realized we would go to bed after midnight for a movie I didn't even care about. T-Mobile Tuesday was giving us $2 apiece for Baskin Robbins, but I nixed that idea because last time we did that, Tim was mad at himself afterward for eating ice cream and sabotaging himself. So I suggested a walk.

We took 20 minutes to walk around our block, which is 1.09 miles if you include one cul-de-sac, which we did. We are committing to walking together 5 evenings a week, and I'm really looking forward to some consistency. My gym workouts have been few and far between lately.

I'm feeling motivated, but even if the motivation goes away, I am committing to this. To myself. To my husband and our future children. To my life.

After our walk tonight

3 comments:

  1. Awesome... This is a great motivator for me as well you are awesome

    ReplyDelete
  2. from Margaret Rastas

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  3. If you want to commit to something like walking daily or whatever, I can check in with you to make sure you’re doing it!

    ReplyDelete