But sinking is a good thing. You see, back in the days of extreme fatness, or "The Dark Ages" as I just decided to call them, swimming just wasn't the same. Not only did I sport shorts and a tank top in the pool because I was too embarrassed to wear an actual bathing suit, but due to the floating fat factor, I couldn't even sit on the steps without floating up. I was like a human buoy, and I was mortified about that. I would hold onto a rail to keep my feet on the floor or push myself down using the wall, and pretend like there was nothing wrong. Not even my arms would stay down. Horrifying.
Last week, I house sat at a place with a pool, so I went swimming several times. I have been wearing a normal bathing suit for the last several years, but last weekend I had to go get a new one because my bottoms kept threatening to fall down. The top, which I bought years ago never expecting to wear because it was too small at the time, fits now but is much too inappropriate to wear around anyone of the opposite gender, so buying a less revealing, better fitting bathing suit was a necessity. The new one is still kinda hoochie in the top, so I did a little fun editing for the picture I'm bravely putting in this post.
Inappropriate cleavage revealage aside, I feel awesome in this bathing suit! I wore it around the house one day because it makes me feel thin! And it's cute! I realized I had a problem though, when I kept finding myself in swimsuit model poses, making pouty faces at the dog. Hahahahahahahahaha!!! Completely joking. But my incredibly blunt friend stopped by while I was hanging out in my bathing suit, and she totally looked me up and down and said with big eyes, "Katie, you have lost so much weight!" This same blunt friend has no scruples in telling me to lose weight every time I tell her about a new guy possibility. There is no filter there. It's kind of refreshing!! If you want a brutally honest opinion about something, I'll introduce you.
I know my body is by no means in the shape I would like for it to be yet, but for the first time maybe ever, including childhood, next time I go to the beach, I won't feel self conscience about being seen in a bathing suit. Also, I'm suddenly motivated to tone my upper legs! I'm gonna start running tonight! My new tennis shoes from Kohl's arrived today and are waiting for me to break them in.
Oh, and I climbed the ginormostairs twice today. My legs felt jello-y and appreciative!