Tickets to the gun show

Are you intimidated by my guns?



Yeah, I didn't think so. Mostly right now it's just embarrassing flab and not sleek showy biceps. Not that I want to be a body builder or anything, but I would like to have nicer arms. Toned arms. Arms that make grown men cry and women weep with bitter jealousy.

Not really.

What I really want is to not be embarrassed by my arm flab when I wear a wedding dress someday. Do you know how many pictures of me there will be? I don't want to hate them all. I want to be toned and look nice. Not that I'm planning this wedding, although I would like to. God has not yet brought me to the man He created me for. I am waiting, sort of patiently. Sometimes not so patiently. Although not so impatiently as to say yes to someone I would like to marry but I know is not God's plan for me. Sorry, I'm just kinda sad right now.

Being a Noah, I was born to be muscular. It's in our DNA. This brought me a lot of grief as a teen before I figured out that not everyone has the same build, and my body is not meant to fit in size 6 jeans. If I was nothing more than skin and bones, even THOSE would not fit into a size 6. I'm built like a softball player, and I'm totally fine with that now. But I'm also living with the repercussions of getting extremely fat, and now I have all sorts of flab that just ads to my already bulky frame. And I hate sleeves. If it were up to me, I would go sleeveless all the time. Hence the recent arm workouts.

I know it's not good to work out the same set of muscles every day, because they need time to heal, so I'm doing weight training with my arms every couple days. I'm hoping that at some point, I'll be able to see results, although right now my attempts just seem futile. But this time I'm gonna stick with it and not give up after a few workouts, like I have in the past. I'm going for lovely arms.

Aside from this new arm goal, I'm also getting back into being disciplined about losing weight in general. I did lose some last year before gaining some back during the Season of Temptation, but overall I am only ten pounds down from this time last year. Not good. I did maintain pretty well, but I'm feeling sluggish and gross, so it's time to kick my butt and drop some more weight. I still want to lose 70 pounds, and to help get me to that ultimate goal, I have joined not one, but TWO weight loss challenges/competitions.

The first is really just a challenge to lose 10% of my body weight in ten weeks, but there is a prize if I do so, and if my story is picked to be shared, I get an even bigger prize. I like prizes! I have to take a before and after picture for this challenge, so here is my before:



The second is a competition with the same group against whom I competed last year. This one has a cash prize for first and second place, and the goal is to lose the highest percentage. My friend Sullia beat me last year by just a little, and this year I seek retribution. She is going down. There will be much trash talking in the coming months, but it's really just because we love each other and both do much better with a little healthy competition. But I'm gonna win. That is happening.

Actually, for those of you needing some competition to get you motivated, this one starts on Sunday, and I encourage you to join. It goes for 12 weeks, and there is a buy-in of $10, with the first place winner receiving 2/3 of the money and second place receiving 1/3. I met some really good friends in this group last year, and it was so helpful in keeping me on track. If you want in, let me know and I'll get you hooked up. But I will beat you. Just know that

Time Flies

I haven't written a post in an entire month. May came and went, and I lost all of three pounds and barely exercised at all. However, as long as I get at least a C on my math final, on Monday I will have my AA and be able to breath again. Or be out of breath again, as the case may be. Because I plan to hit the gym like a madwoman! And madwomen generally don't breath. Trust me! It's a fact I just made up!

The month of June brings a weight loss competition that I plan to win, not only for the lovely stack of presidential flashcards presented to the winner, but because my body is starting to feel fat to me again. It's strange, really, because I haven't gained anything, but it makes sense in my mind. You know how they always say, "Lose just ten percent of your body weight, and your health will improve, and your chances for Diabetes will go down drastically."?? Well, how long do those health benefits last? I have lost close to 35% of my body weight, but it has been a while since I've lost a good amount, so I think my body has just gotten used to this new level of weight, and this is now the new normal. And I still need to lose about 55 pounds. So now I'm sort of back at the beginning... "Lose just ten percent of your body weight, and your health will improve, and your chances for Diabetes will go down drastically." Sounds like a plan.

Ten percent of my body weight right now would be 21.5 pounds. That will be my goal for the month, but I'll be happy if I just reach the 100s again. Maybe I'm not strict enough with my goals, but I've come this far, right? So something's working. Maybe it's the lack of strict goals that works for me. Maybe I don't get along with strict goals. Maybe I want to punch strict goals in the face! Hint... I do.

Side note: I totally just poured water on myself because apparently I don't know how to drink out of a water bottle. Classy!

You know what's fantastic? When I started at Pierce College, I had to really squeeze into the desks and I was always uncomfortable and self-conscious about how I looked to those around me. Now, not only do I fit just fine in the desks, but I cross my legs underneath, which was physically impossible before! I'm almost a normal-sized person now!

So now that I will no longer be at Pierce College, I must take a moment of silence for the ginormostairs... That monstrous beast that was the initial kick in the butt I needed to get in shape. I will miss those stairs, and the burn in my buttocks and thighs as I neared the top every day. The feeling that my legs have turned to noodles will be missed. Or achieved in other ways. But I deeply appreciate the simplicity of the stairs and their contribution to my new health and happiness.



Thanks, stairs. None of this would have been possible without you.

Move it or lose it!

Nothing motivates quite as well as a little friendly competition, especially when money is involved. Since January 1st, I have been part of a weight loss competition group on Facebook, which has been a great source of motivation, with weigh ins every week, and a buy in of $5, to be paid to the winner at the end.

Our first 90 day challenge just ended on Sunday, and I didn't meet the goal I set at the beginning, which was to lose 40 pounds. I did, however, lose 21 pounds in that time, which was the same amount the winner lost, but since she started out 72 pounds lighter than me, her percentage lost was obviously higher. I didn't mind losing to her, though, because she's really great! That was one of the best parts of this group: I met some really awesome girls who are now my friends, and I'm excited to hang out with them again soon!

Part of the reason I didn't lose as much as I wanted to during the last challenge is that I didn't go to the gym very often in that time. School is keeping me extra busy this semester, but starting now I will be making more of an effort to work out several times a week. I just reconnected with an old friend from Tucson who now lives ten minutes away from me, and she also happens to already have a membership at 24 Hour Fitness, where I go. She has a lot of experience with personal trainers and she's gonna help me whip myself into shape! I love having someone to go to the gym with, and I'm happy to be able to spend time with this friend again. When we got together on Saturday night, we hadn't seen each other in ten years! We have gym plans every day this week while I'm on Spring Break, and that should be a really great jump start for the next challenge, which started on Sunday when the last one ended.

The goal I set for this challenge was to lose 31 pounds. I know that with the help of my group and my new gym buddy, this should be a breeze! I'm even gonna try to beat my own goal and lose more than 31 pounds, but it won't bother me if I don't. I know that all of this extra weight will be gone soon, and the most important thing is that I'm getting healthy and that I feel amazing! My life has changed so much in the last six months, and I go around with a perpetual smile on my face. I have always been a pretty happy person, but the joy I feel now that I've broken free from this stronghold that my weight had over my life is incredible!

A few extra things:

1. I'm taking a friend to get his driver's license in a few weeks, and at the same time, I think I'll get a new license picture and change my listed weight. When I got my license, I weighed 60 pounds more than I said I did, and now I weigh 19 pounds less than what is listed! So I'm gonna lie again and say I weigh 180, because pretty soon, I really will!

2. I put on the red dress again a few days ago, and I think I need to officially retire the dress. I had to hold onto a handful of material at the back to make it tight.



Compare that picture to this one of me wearing the dress on Christmas day. Alex and I decided that we needed to dress formally for Christmas last year. Haha!



I think I should go try on beautiful dresses this week. I can't afford to buy one, but it will be fantastic to try on dresses that they have in the store because now I'm actually a size that they carry! I love that I still like to play dress up as much as I did when I was a little girl. Some things never change. Wanting to feel beautiful is something that is built into girls, and that desire will never go away, no matter how old I get.